Alice’s Day

Thanks to my friend Ellen Komp for informing me that it is Alice’s Day. Did you know it is the 150th anniversary of the publication of Alice in Wonderland? Neither did I, but Ellen posted a delighted tribute on her blog, Tokin’ Woman. Check it out.

The blog commemorates the original Lewis Carroll story but also has a nice reference to Grace Slick who implored a generation to “Go Ask Alice.” Many of us did … and received some interesting answers. Perhaps that is why my blog has so many mushroom pictures. ❧

July 5, 2015 1

An Easter Bunny

Frequent readers are familiar with my cousin Bunny. She recently turned 95 years old and things are not what we would hope for her. Physically strong she has a form of dementia that blocks her memory of the present time. She will repeatedly ask the same question or make the same observation, like an old phonograph player that gets stuck on the same part of a record. But the Bunny we love is still there, it just takes some creativity to jostle the brain into “forward.”

One modern invention that helps with that process is the iPad. Frequently I will take it with me when I visit and we look at old family photos. This series of pictures shows Bunny and her daughter-in-law, Joanne, “visiting” with Bunny’s great-grandchildren, Winston and Ellery. Bunny seemed to grasp the concept of video-visits with no problem, only the appropriate wonder such technology deserves.

So, on this Easter Sunday, I give you Bunny. Still alive, still loved, and still loving. ❧

Bunny and iPad2015__0315___667 — Bunny, in Sarasota, Florida, “connects” with Winston, her year-old great-grandson in Kentucky.

Bunny and iPad2015__0315___669 — Here Bunny points at her own image in the upper-left corner of the iPad.

Bunny and iPad2015__0315___670 — A wave from Grammy.

Bunny and iPad2015__0315___671 — Bunny, her son Milo, and Ellery, her great-granddaughter, have a visit.

April 5, 2015 2

Image #274 – Gertie

Gertie was a rescue gerbil. I had gotten it in my head that I wanted a gerbil but shopping for one, as with most things, was a chore and I quickly tired of it. The sales associate at Petco seemed to sense my fatigue and wondered if I might be interested in a “slightly used” gerbil that had been left with them. I followed her to a back room where this pretty white gerbil was sequestered away, “had to be sure she wasn’t diseased,” the associate explained. The gerbil had been with them for ten days and was cleared from quarantine. I could have her for $4, including the cage. Well, I’m not much of a shopper but I do know a bargain.

Gertie was with me for almost three years and I loved that rodent. She settled right into life with Alice and I quickly learned she had style and panache. After she died I turned to other gerbils but none had the espirit that my Gertie had.

Amazing how we come to love critters … from dogs and cats to gerbils and a whole slew of others. It speaks well for Homo sapiens that we can develop this closeness, this appreciation for the vast diversity that has been given to us on this blue and white marble that we call Earth. We screw up a lot and are far from perfect but there are these moments of happiness brought on by simply opening our heart to others, human or otherwise. Remember, you take the love with you. ❧

August 30, 2014 0

Images #224, 225, & 226 – Bunny’s 94th Birthday

I’ve written many times about my cousin Bunny. Yesterday was her 94th birthday and her son John put together a small party. He served one of Bunny’s favorites–Maine lobster! I can tell you that despite her age she still knows how to appreciate a Maine lobster. It brought back some wonderful memories of a long ago summer when my mother and I traveled to Vermont, where Bunny was living at the time, and we went out to a small restaurant with brown kraft paper for a table cloth and the best lobster I have ever eaten. But what was more delicious was watching these two women, my mother and cousin Bunny, expertly dissect those lobsters to get every possible morsel. It was masterful.

Bunny has a kind of dementia that makes it hard for her to retain short-term memory but she still enjoys a good party. Her dementia made for a couple of interesting moments during the party. John presented the lobsters and Bunny asked what was the occasion? When told it was her birthday she was completely surprised.

It gave new meaning to “surprise party.” 🙂

This was the first time I ever attended a party for a 94 year-old and how lovely that it was such a special lady. She’s got 94 years of memories in that head and she shared some of them last night. The present may not be that important anyway. There is a Simon & Garfunkel song called “Old Friends” with a lovely line: Preserve your memories/they’re all that’s left you. That’s something to think about. Let’s hope we can all smile this warmly when we are 94. ❧

March 27, 2014 3

Image #222 – Ancient Oak/Ancient People

Tango and I came across this incredible, ancient oak tree while exploring at Myakka River State Park last week. The base of the trunk was enormous and I would estimate that it would take three people holding hands to encircle it. Its gnarly, pock-marked bark put me in mind of my cousin Bunny and a song that John Prine wrote and was covered by numerous people, including Kris Kristoferson and Bette Midler. Called “Hello in There” the lyrics go:

You know, Old trees just get stronger/Old rivers grow wider every day

But old people just get lonesome/Waiting for someone to say

Hello in there/Hello.

That describes my cousin Bunny perfectly. She will be 94 years-old tomorrow (March 26) and she has a form of dementia that is so hard, for her and us. She cannot retain any recent memory. She awakens and her mind is blank. She wonders where she is but when you tell her she cannot retain it. Things loop around continuously. I am very patient with her and have discovered that if you are patient enough (and she must be patient too) you can get some things to “stick.” Once that process happens you can dig deeper and things begin to emerge. She seems to have memories of 2005-2007 but not much beyond that. The fall that injured her pelvis and led her to the ALF occurred in 2010. So for 4 to 7 years she has been floating in the dream-like world wherein she frequently is driving and she awakens thinking she has just driven in from New England or “the boonies.” I asked her what the “boonies” are and she said “the Florida forest.” I wonder what images she is tapping into because she has been coming to Florida since the 1940s.

It is wondrous on many levels but on a basic human level it is very sad. Two days ago she got into a loop of asking if she had asked these questions before.

“Yes,” I reply.

“Today?” she asks.

“Yes,” I reply.

“Several times?” she asks.

“Yes,” I reply.

“Well,” she drolly replies, “that must be tiresome.”

I could only laugh … and hope the tears in my eyes don’t fall down my cheeks. ❧

March 25, 2014 0

Image #202 – Holiday Inn, circa 1950

There was once a time in America when no two motels were the same. As the great day of the automobile blossomed so did accommodations for weary travelers. There were many “Mom & Pop” motels that consisted of small cabins, like this one that I found abandoned in north Georgia. Even though there were many styles the colors of green and white seemed a common thread. ❧

February 15, 2014 3

Image #195 – Groundhog Day

Another Groundhog’s Day has come and gone. This is a special time of year for me. The dates–February 1 and 2–have special significance. It was forty years (!) ago yesterday (Feb. 1) that Robert and I began living together. In 1974 we had already known one another for eight years. We became good friends long before we became “a couple.” That friendship was the dearest thing of my life. When we became lovers it was a natural extension of the bond between us, a bond that grew and grew. He was the love of my life.

Groundhog’s Day? Well, anyone who knew us in the 80s and 90s is aware that Groundhog’s Day was Robert’s favorite holiday. Each year he would memorialize the event by mailing Groundhog’s greetings to all our friends. Long before there was email there was snail mail. Robert would write the card–a rather esoteric report on the world at large– and I would edit it. Then it was off to the copy shop. One year we sent out close to 200 “Groundhog” cards. We would fold, stuff, lick and stamp the envelopes. I suppose we were able to produce a mailing list somehow. I think back to those days of eight inch floppy discs that actually flopped and could hold next to nothing in terms of data but they were “State-of-the-art” to us and we somehow made them work.

Today, Groundhog’s Day, I heard from several old friends who remembered those oddly charming cards. They are missed, just as Robert is missed.

So, in honor of all that, I present a picture of Franklin Fred. He showed himself back in November and I can’t recall if there was a shadow or not, just an anxious dog who wanted to chase that groundhog in the worst way. Groundhog’s Day was Robert’s favorite holiday because in February 1978 we were visited by two young folks from Arkansas, pot farmers visiting the nation’s capital. It was a bleak period in our lives. After fifteen months of legal access to federal marijuana the feds had managed to lure away Robert’s doctor and close down the program that provided him marijuana. The young couple had read about Robert’s dilemma and arrived in Washington with a substantial amount of prime Arkansas marijuana. In exchange for a place to stay Robert received a gift of medical marijuana that would carry him through the next couple of months–until his lawyers were able to re-instate Robert’s prescriptive access.

Those were incredible days. We were blessed with the gift that keeps on giving, the love of good friends. And that is what Groundhog’s Day means to me. Thank you all. ❧

February 2, 2014 1

Image #190 – Bunny and Ellery

Frequent readers may recall Image #180 from a few days ago. It featured my 93-year old cousin Bunny with her great grandson Winston. It is only fair to post a picture of Bunny with her other great grandchild, Ellery. Two great grand babies in one year! Ellery is the oldest, she was born about nine months ago. Winston followed about seven months later. Bunny was able to connect with both of them and in reviewing the pictures tonight I was struck with how animated Bunny was during her encounters with these babies. The very old and the very young are similar in many ways. I wonder why we don’t combine their care into one facility? ❧

January 27, 2014 0

#186 – Florida Sunset

That’s my cousin Bridget Perry with her ten-week old son, Winston, watching the sunset at Point of Rocks in Sarasota, FL It was taken about two weeks ago, just after the first major cold front passed through, affecting about 2/3 of the nation. Now we are enduring the second cold front and I think I posted this particular picture because it is full of hope and warmth–two qualities we need just now. ❧

January 22, 2014 0

Image #180 – Generations

The holidays are officially over. Tomorrow — Monday, January 6th — we return to “real time” but the past two weeks have been that special time of the year when things seem to slow down and focus draws inward to home and hearth. For me this passing holiday time has been especially memorable, a time to share the joy of my cousins and, in particular, a special woman — cousin Bunny — who can be seen greeting her great grandson Winston.

Consider, for a moment, the generational spread that is captured in this picture. Winston is just ten weeks old. Bunny is 93 years old. If Winston lives to be as old as Bunny the year will be 2106. Any 93 year old person who gazed upon Bunny when she was Winston’s age would have been born in 1827!

Let’s come at it from another perspective. When Winston was born in 2013 the president of the U.S. was Barack Obama. When Bunny was born in 1920 the president was Woodrow Wilson. And for our imagined 93 year old who gazed upon the newborn Bunny in 1920 the president in 1827 was John Quincy Adams! ❧

January 5, 2014 1

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this: